


Man Door Hand Hook Ship Door

by ThefirstRanger



Category: The Brotherband Chronicles - John Flanagan
Genre: Community (TV) References, Gen, Man Door Hand Hook Car Door, Scary stories that aren't scary
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-23
Updated: 2020-01-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 15:02:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22369150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThefirstRanger/pseuds/ThefirstRanger
Summary: The Herons are telling scary stories and Jesper tells a story that hits a little too close to home for the crew that has to run drills under the instruction of Thorn Hookyhand. Chaos ensues.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 12





	Man Door Hand Hook Ship Door

The Herons are sitting around a campfire one night on the The Heron. It’s in the middle of their journey and they need a break. Thorn had gone off grumbling about how he needed some alone time and the teens were alone.

“Thorn’s not around. Let’s tell some scary stories.” suggests Stefan eagerly. They all agreed, some more reluctantly than others. 

Stefan told the best one of the night so far, but Lydia had a bone chilling tale of a miner and a collapsed mine. Ingvar straight up refused to tell one and Edvin’s was too convoluted for it to be truly scary. Finally, it was Jesper’s turn. 

“This is the scariest tale I know. Be prepared to scream.”

None of the Herons took Jesper’s warning seriously. They should have. He started his tale.

“man & girl go out to sail under moonlight they stop at on at a side of riverbank

he turn to his girl and say

"baby, I love you very much

what is it honey?

"our ship is broken down. I think the rudder is broken. ill swim and get some more wood.”

“ok ill stay here and look after our mangler. there have been news report of mnglers being stolen

good idea. keep the doors locked no matter what i love you sweaty. 

so the guy left to get wooud for the ship. after two hours the girl say where is my

baby, he was supposed to be back by now”. then the girl here a scratching

sound and voice say “LET ME IN

the girl doesnt do it and then after a while she goes to sleep. 

the next morning she wakes up and finds her boyfriend still not there she gets out to

check and man door hand hook ship door" 

There was silence for a long time. Jesper had a satisfied smile on his face; he had scared everyone. 

Finally Wulf spoke. "What in the name of Gorlog was that supposed to-" 

Stefan cut him off with wide eyes. "Shut up! Do you all hear something?" 

Everyone strained their hears. Slowly, but surely, they could hear something in the distance. Scritch, scritch, scritch. It was the sound of metal on wood. Scritch, scritch, scritch.

The sound came closer. It was louder now. Scritch, scritch, scritch. 

In the loudest whisper he dare muster, Ulf yelled at Jesper. "ARE YOU DOING THIS?" 

Jesper shook his head, terror plain on his face. "N-no." 

His face white, Stig stood up. "I’ll take a look.” The dark didn’t quite disguise his gulp of fear, but everyone ignored it. 

“What if it’s the man door hand hook ship door?” Ulf pulled Stig down but was thrown off for his efforts. 

Stig crept towards the side of the ship carefully. When he got to the side, he looked around and shook his head. 

“There’s nothing here you-” A hooked hand slammed down on his hand, interrupting his thought. 

“AHHHHHHH!” No one was quite sure who screamed first but soon they were all screaming. Ulf and Jesper ran into each other, knocking the other down. Stefan was halfway out of the boat, frozen in terror.

A shadowy figure burst onto the ship and waved his hook hand around. Everyone screamed louder. 

“AAAHHHHHHHHHH!” No one had ever heard Hal scream that high. 

Finally, in all the commotion, Ingvar grabbed Edvin’s frying pan and slammed it into the shadowy figure’s head. The figure dropped and rolled into the firelight. It was Thorn. 

Now everyone was really frozen in terror. They heard a splash; Stefan had fallen into the water. 

“What are we going to do?” wailed Wulf. 

“You knocked out Thorn!” cried Ulf. “He’s gonna make us run drills until we die! It’s all Ingvar’s fault!" 

"Don’t blame Ingvar,” Lydia twirled and pointed at Jesper. “Blame him! He told the story!"

“Me? You’re the ones that got scared!" 

Stefan was splashing around in the water. "My whole brain is freaking out right now!”

This started a four way argument between Lydia, Jesper, Ulf and Wulf, and Ingvar. Stig was trying to keep the peace, but Lydia kept making some really good points for blaming Jesper. Thorn was still sprawled on the ground. 

Personally, Edvin was more scared of how quickly the brotherband had turned on each other, but all things considered it was a reasonable response. Edvin turned to Hal. “Please tell me you have some idea of how to fix this…" 

Hal thought deeply. He looked at the mess in front of him. He looked at Thorn, unconscious on the ground, limbs sprawled all over. He looked at Stefan splashing around. Hal had only one shot to fix this. 

"Guys, this may sound crazy but you have to trust me." 

~ 

Some time later, Thorn started to stir from the frying pan induced slumber. All around him, the other Herons started to wake up and look around. All Thorn could remember after he came back to the Heron was dark shapes, a whole lot of screaming, and not much else. 

"What in Gorlog’s beard happened?” He said, rubbing a bump on his head. 

The Herons exchanged guileless looks with each other. 

“I guess we ALL got hit with a frying pan.” Hal was a bit too nonchalant in his deliver, but Thorn didn’t notice the over enunciation. 

“Yeah, somebody hit all of us with a frying pan,” Jesper swayed a little. They really needed to sell this act and someone had to carry the team. 

Ingvar stiffly began his rehearsed part. “And now we’re ALL,” He spread his arms out wide. “Gaining conscious together. At the exact same time. What a coincidence”

Thorn looked at them and scratched his head with his hook. This act caused all of the Herons to stiffen. 

“I don’t understand. How were all of us knocked out and by who? Did someone try to enter the ship? I told you to keep the doors locked.” Narrowing his eyes, Thorn looked around the boat suspiciously.

Jesper glanced at Hal. Hal nodded at Stig who slowly reached for the frying pan. 

Man door hand hook ship door indeed. 

~ 

Thorn never really figured out what happened that night and no one dared to tell him. It slowly became a laughable moment and all it takes for then on is the single utterance of “Man door hand hook ship door” to break any of the Herons down into laughter. 

The tale becomes very popular around Hallasholm and, over time, gets immortalized forever and is inscribed in a book of famous tales. The book is forgotten until Professor Giles MacFarlane and his assistant professor Audrey find a copy in their excavation of Hallasholm after their success in Araluen. The story is revived along with many others, but is distorted over the years due to the nebulous nature of the ballad and Jesper's horrible handwriting. The tale inspires many more like it over the centuries, but none could ever come close to the original story.

**Author's Note:**

> I have no excuse for this except it fit so well with the Herons.


End file.
